Historically in American culture, we identify playing sports as a masculine activity and dressing up dolls as a feminine activity; when revealing a baby’s gender, we use blue as the color for boys and pink as the color for girls; and in a family dynamic we expect the father to be the bread winner and the mother to be the care giver. There’s nothing wrong about dividing human race into two genders and identify each with opposite traits. Like the sun and the moon, summer and winter, our world has been originally made of opposite elements. While there are books to prove that men are from “Mars” and women are from “Venus”, often times we tend to ignore that we are all living on “Earth” and we are equally contributing to all that is amazing around. At the same time we are also responsible to maintain harmony between these two polarities.
Opposite Sides of the Coin
It is common sense that opposite attracts, and it comes in all forms. People from different genders are attractive to each other, people in different professions are interested in each other, and people with different cultural background are curious about each other. However as a human race, we also feel fearful about gender choices that we are not familiar with, generate bias towards people from different industries than our own, and spread negative words about people who honors different traditions or belief systems from us. The situation seems quite complicated at times yet it’s quite simple. We are all different from each other, and that’s what makes the human experience unique and beautiful, as we are all part of this beautiful planet called earth. However we selectively prefer certain differences over the others, and we tend to highlight our hatred towards those opposite sides more than appreciate the diversity that we get to enjoy and learn from. Even for the ones that we loved at the beginning thanks to our opposites, we ended up finding the unbearable parts and feel terrible about it.
The Hidden Wisdom of Life
The most extreme polarity we get to experience is birth and death, and they are both cathartic and poetic at the same time based on how you look at it. The interesting thing about life is that there’s no absolute black and white, or right and wrong. In fact each single one of us carries light and shadow within us all the time. There’s no way to go through time with only positive experience and it is also unnecessary to see negative encounters as simply bad. We were birthed into this world through the womb of our mothers and we will die and exit the world by returning to the dirt. Nobody can avoid either birth or death, hence none of us can avoid joy or sorrow. We play only a very small part within a very big world, and none of us is complete. That being said, all of us are capable of feeling whole. When we find our way to accept the darker side within ourselves, we will naturally find more ease and acceptance of the darker side of everything that’s happening in the world. Similarly when we become more aware of the joy inside our heart, we become more attuned to feel the joy all around us.
Infinite Possibilities
Our initial yearning of finding a partner, is partially because we don’t feel complete on our own. Sometimes it is because our personality is lacking aspects of dynamic that another person can help awaken within us; other times it is because our talent and gifts have been limited to certain areas and a new encounter can help us ignite what’s been yearning to come to the surface. On a regular basis we can also just feel lonely, and we desire for company. The truth is, we are all made of different elements originated from earth, however each of us is like a puzzle piece alone, and only by combining all of our strength and uniqueness together can we paint a bigger picture.
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That feeling of true fulfillment will only arrive when we are capable of finding our harmonious way to collaborate with others on something bigger than ourselves, while remain fully aware of the fact that we are complete as an individual and we are enough the way we naturally are. The work should not be limited to getting better at certain specific traits, as it is so much more about recognizing our own light and shadow as well as embracing the same quality in everyone else with full acceptance. It’s never about getting rid of things we don’t like, because it’s about finding the right balance among everything that we get to experience in life wholeheartedly.
